The mind games I can play sometimes astound me.
Recently I went to a restaurant to have lunch and do some editing on my book. I checked to see if my favorite chair was available — the soft one near the receptacle with a fireplace close by, so I could prop up my leg (it’s high-maintenance)
‘My’ chair was empty. I saved it with my jacket and turned around to go order lunch. That’s when I saw someone that I didn’t want to see. Someone (let’s call this person Pat) that I used to be in a closer relationship with, but not anymore. There’s tension between Pat and I now. A few weeks ago, I tried to resolve things via email, but the tension is still there.
I assumed Pat didn’t see me, due to the restaurant setup and an intense conversation with a lunch companion. I ordered, got my food and went back to my chair. The chair had a high back, so I couldn’t see Pat and Pat couldn’t see me. I ate and surfed the web as the mind games began.
I should go say hi.
No you shouldn’t.
I need to be an adult. I need to take steps to clear the tension between us.
No, you don’t need to. If anyone needs to clear the air, Pat does.
Omg … I just wrote about addressing conflict before it becomes a bigger problem. So will I take my own advice from that piece?
But if you go over there, you’ll interrupt Pat’s lunch. That’s rude.
True, I don’t want to be rude. A mature adult wouldn’t do that.
I finished eating and began editing (or pretended to). It was hard to focus on serious work when half my mind was arguing with the other half.
The window near me reflected Pat’s table, so I could see both heads nodding in an earnest discussion. I was not close enough to hear the conversation and I was glad, because depending what Pat was talking about, it would frustrate me.
Okay … that last sentence is a total lie, I was wishing I could hear ever word that was said. (Oh, don’t act so shocked … depending on the situation, you would probably wish the same.)
The mental gymnastics continued …
I really need to walk over there. Face to face is better than emails.
To be continued …Mental Gymnastics – Part 2 Mental Gymnastics – The conclusion