Review of Growing Up Amish and an Interview with Ira Wagler

Growing Up Amish is an excellent book … with great writing and a story that captures the reader. There’s adventure, struggle, joy and sadness in the book as Ira Wagler continually searches for truth, which brings him the freedom and peace he desires.

From Amazon: This memoir offers a nuanced account from a man who straddled both Amish and “English” (non-Amish) worlds. Wagler recounts his Amish upbringing, from dating conventions and worship services to local gossip and schoolyard bullies. The simplicity of everyday life may seem quaint on the surface. Yet Wagler bravely goes on to expose pervasive dissatisfaction among both youth and adult Amish living in what he characterizes as a stifling, formulaic world. Such unspoken displeasure sparked a cycle of coming and going for the author, who repeatedly crept away from his community only to return, if reluctantly, for its familiarity. It was a “paradox that would haunt me for almost ten years: the tug-of-war between two worlds.” His tale of restlessness looks acutely at the clash of family ties with love of freedom.

‘Outsiders’ to the Amish world often wonder what it’s like to live as an Amish person … and most have a glamorous view of it, which too many other books promote. The reality is sheltered cultures are generally only glamorous to outsiders looking in.

I did not grow up Amish, but I grew up traditional strict Mennonite … some of the rules are different, but the two cultures have similarities. I’ve been frustrated with the idealistic view that is painted of these cultures, which is why I like Growing Up Amish. Ira does an excellent job describing the frustrations within that world, while not being malicious about it. He states the facts of his life in a way that I appreciate and according to my friend (an ‘outsider’), makes them understandable to readers that aren’t familiar with that world.

Ira lives in my area and thanks to our mutual friend Shawn, I had the privilege of meeting him at a picnic a few weeks ago. We enjoyed an evening of chatting about leaving the boxes of our childhoods, writing and having books published. I had a few questions for him which he answers below.

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Janet: In Growing Up Amish … the reader learns about your ten-year struggle in deciding whether or not to stay Amish. During those years, you did join the Amish church for a time. When you left, you were shunned (excommunicated) … are you still shunned today?

Ira: For a brief period of time, maybe a year, I was excommunicated from the Amish church in Bloomfield, Iowa after I fled back out into the “world.” The shunning consisted mostly of not eating at the same table. And I was restricted from socializing with my peers, mostly.

I am not shunned today, because I left the Amish church for the final time as a member in the Goshen, Indiana community. There, they were much more progressive (unlike Lancaster County, where I reside today) and they honored my decision to join a Mennonite church, a church they considered biblical. It was almost like a crap shoot. Depends on the place of departure, whether or not you are excommunicated.

And it has a LOT of ramifications. It affects relationships and how one is viewed, in many communities. I can’t be thankful enough that I’m not excommunicated today, because that could be used as one big stick that some (not all) Amish people might use to discredit me.

Janet: And if so, how does that affect your relationship with your family?

Ira: Today, I am close to all my siblings. Some are Amish, some are plain Mennonite, or Beachy Amish. All of us have mellowed with the passing of time, and we are all glad to see each other when we get together.

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Janet: Love reading about your teenage friends, the “gang of six”. What happened to them … are they still Amish and are you still friends?

Of the six, only one remains Amish. In Bloomfield, Mervin Gingerich, the bishop’s son, married and settled in the church. Today, he is an Amish preacher. I have kept in contact with Marvin Yutzy (my brother-in-law), and Rudy Yutzy. During my book signing in Daviess County, Indiana in mid-August, Vern Herschberger drove up from his home in Tennessee. We had not seen each other in more than 30 years. It was a joyful reunion, made possible by the book. That’s wild stuff, and I am grateful.

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Janet: Memoirs are tough to write because they involve people who are still living … what has the reaction been from family and friends mentioned in the book?

I have been amazed at how strongly my siblings support me. Sure, there may be a few issues, a few scenes some of them would rather have seen excluded. But overall, their support has been very strong. I’m sure they hear it, in some of their communities, the negative comments on how I shouldn’t have written the book. But they remain firmly loyal, and we are all close.

My friends in general have had the same reaction. Nothing but support and encouragement. And maybe a bit of amazement at how well the book is doing out there. Again, I can’t be thankful enough for all of it; the support and the success of the book.

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Janet: Now that your book is out … is there anything else you wish you would have said in it?

You know, that is a great question. I have read and reread the book. Forward, backward, upside down, whatever. And there are maybe half a dozen spots where I would change some of the wording. Not much, though. There are a few scenes that didn’t make it, but Tyndale did a fantastic job of cutting and fusing what remained. The Tyndale people were (and are) a real class act. All of them, or at least all of those with whom I worked.

So, to answer your question: No.

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Are you working on any new projects … books or other writing projects?

Mostly just tinkering with a few ideas, some basic outlining. And writing and posting now and then on my blog at www.IraWagler.com. I have been very busy, working full time at my job, and devoting most of my spare time to promoting the book, traveling for book signings, and so forth. This whole experience has been intense and very gratifying. And, of course, I’d love to be published again. But I guess the market will decide that.

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Ira Wagler was born in the small Old Order Amish community of Aylmer, Ontario. At 17, frustrated by the rules and restrictions of Amish life, Ira got up at 2 am, left a note under his pillow, packed his duffel bag and left. Over the course of the next 5 years, Ira would leave and return home numerous times … at age 26, Ira left the Amish for good.

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If you prefer to view the Amish culture as simplistic and perfect … you might not want to read this book. But if you want to read about one man’s journey and gain an honest view of that world, of the frustrations and tensions that can be present, especially when someone questions the norm …

get a copy of Growing Up Amish here

Readers in Southeast PA … you have a chance to meet Ira. He’s doing a book signing at a new art gallery in Lancaster. Stop in at the Freiman Stoltzfus Gallery on Prince Street tomorrow between 11 and 1.

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Any questions about the Amish or other things for Ira?

If you are familiar with the Amish culture or if you aren’t … how do you view it?