Book Review and Interview with Karen Anderson

The Fitbloggin’ conference was the beginning of many wonderful things for me … one of them being meeting Karen Anderson. The wine and cheese party her roommate and she threw in their hotel room the last evening was so popular people spilled out into the hallway. Which tells you a lot about Karen already … she likes people. Which actually tells you that she likes herself  because you can’t like others unless you like yourself first. Which means her journey of self-acceptance through her book and her blogging is working.

Karen’s book AFTER The Before & After: A Real-Life Story of Weight Loss, Weight Gain and Weightlessness Through Total Acceptance was released in February. It tells Karen’s story of struggling with self-acceptance … After having been obese for most of her adult life and thinking she’d magically lose weight “some day,” Karen finally got it together and lost 55 pounds in 2005. As a “weight loss success story” with her picture on the cover of a weekly women’s magazine, she thought she had finally “gotten it” and would live happily ever after. And then, like the vast majority of people who lose a significant amount of weight, she regained half of it. And that’s where this story begins.

I love Karen’s book … though I tend to always have a few pounds I want to lose, I’ve never been obese, but I love AFTER The Before & After because it’s not a typical weigh-loss book. What I connected with was Karen’s ongoing journey of self-acceptance. She is willing to ask herself tough questions about the way she does or does not treat herself. She learns, stumbles, forgives and tries again. She accepts what is while seeking to move forward.

Karen’s writing is comfortable and easy to read … it’s like sitting down and having a conversation with her. I read all of AFTER The Before & After right away and now I find myself picking up the book from time to time, especially on days I want to beat myself up for something.

Below is an email interview Karen and I did … enjoy!

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Janet: I love this tagline about your book… Because self-acceptance is more powerful than any diet I’ve ever been on. We’d all like a quick solution or formula to obtaining self-acceptance whether it is concerning food or other areas, but as you so beautifully show us in After (the Before and After), it is more of a slow, steady process. What are one or two beginning steps you’ve discovered that people can use to help move themselves towards self-acceptance?

Karen: First there has to be awareness of the lack of self-acceptance. We might know that something is not right in our lives, but we don’t understand that at the basis of this feeling is a lack of self-acceptance.

I didn’t realize just how deep and intense my self-loathing was until a therapist asked me to say, out loud, “Even though I am overweight, I still love and accept myself.” I couldn’t say it! I didn’t believe it.

Once you’re aware, it helps to know why self-acceptance is important. It’s not just a woo-woo touchy-feeling concept. When you don’t accept yourself, it causes both emotional and physiological stress, which can cause all kinds of other issues (including weight gain!).

And finally, it really does help to just take a deep breath, unscrunch your shoulders, soften your eyes, and say to yourself, “I am okay. I am not broken. I am a whole person. I may not have a perfect body or perfect habits, but who I am is whole, complete, and good.”

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Janet: You write that in your family the “Women were to be seen, not heard.” I found that interesting because the women were treated the same way in my family. I come from a very religious background, so I thought it was religious-based, but you don’t come from a religious background … so what’s up with everyone thinking women shouldn’t have a voice? Have you been able to move on from that mindset to have a different view of yourself and of other women?

Karen: My family was not religious in the way that yours was. That said, I think that this message was more a sign of the times (for my mother’s and grandmother’s generations) than it was a religious message. And I think it had more to do with the idea that appearance is more important than feelings/thoughts.

That said, the idea of women being seen and not heard was part of a mixed message in my (extended) family. On the one hand, my grandfather’s sisters were all accomplished professionals, but in other parts of the family, women were expected to play traditional roles. I was encouraged to get good grades and go to college, but I was also taught that good girls don’t rock the boat or show off…and that having a voice was important, as long as I didn’t disagree or have my own opinion. 

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Janet: Now that your book is out … is there anything else you wish you would have said in it?

Karen: The book has only been out for about six months and in that amount of time I have gotten more clarity on many of the concepts in it. That makes me wonder if I should have waited. But at the same time, I can keep writing, right? Having a blog allows me to explore some of those concepts more deeply and allows my readers the opportunity to read about them if they wish.

As well, even though the book represents about 18 months in my life, I think providing more background and family history may have helped me tell my story more completely. But to be honest, I wasn’t sure enough of myself to do that.

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Janet: And are you working on any new projects, books or otherwise, now?

Karen: I have several things going on:

I continue to write my blog (because the journey never ends!) and am considering a journal/workbook based on the key lessons I’ve learned.

I’m speaking and doing workshops, which I love. Engaging with others is the best!

And I have gone back to school. I am taking an online class called The Psychology of Eating. The course provides a new and unique way to address weight issues, body image, overeating, compulsive eating, chronic dieting, digestive challenges, mood concerns, energy and fatigue, immunity, nutritional confusion, unwanted eating habits, and nutrition-linked health complaints. On a deeper level, the course is about helping people discover that personal power equals metabolic power.

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Karen is a Author. Blogger. Speaker. Creator of ah-ha moments. Lover of what is.

She blogs about the literal ups and downs after achieving “weight loss success.” Her book – AFTER (the before & after): a real life story of weight loss, weight gain, and weightlessness through total acceptance takes the blog to the next level. It is the result of Karen’s belief that having a healthy body (mind and spirit) shouldn’t be a life-long struggle.

Prior to becoming a freelancer, Karen spent 17 years trying to fit her right-brained self into a left-brained career as a trade magazine journalist in the field of plastics. She worked mostly in New York City, which helped make up for the trauma. She lives in New London, CT, with her husband, Tim who is most definitely a left-brainer. She sincerely appreciates that in him.

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Thank you Karen for ‘chatting’ with me today!

Readers … if you ever say unkind things to yourself, call yourself names, beat yourself up rather then kindly dealing with your own issues or even heap blame on yourself for issues others have … pick up a copy of AFTER The Before & After: A Real-Life Story of Weight Loss, Weight Gain and Weightlessness Through Total Acceptance
… you’ll be glad you did!

If you have any questions for Karen (or I) … feel free to leave a comment, we’ll be here to answer them.