Is “Goals” a Dirty Word?

I’m creative. I can be spontaneous. I like to “go with the flow.” So for a time in my life, goals was a dirty word to me. I didn’t need or want goals, I wanted life to happen on its own.

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I dreamed. I wished. I thought about many things. I envied others. I got frustrated. But I didn’t set goals.

I wanted to do things that were healthy for my body, mind and spirit. I wanted to write a book. I wanted an organized house. But I didn’t set goals.

Guess what … many things I wanted did not happen.

I decided I’ll give goals a try. So I set some. Great goals. Super goals. Unattainable goals. Then when I couldn’t reach them, I was discouraged and upset. And decided my earlier opinion of goals was correct. Goals don’t work.

Frustration with life forced me to re-evaluate the way I approach life. Many times it was with an all or nothing approach … so what would happen if I tried a middle road?

A healthy balance.

I set a few small goals. Take a short walk three times a week. Spend ten minutes a day “being still.” Clean out one drawer a week. To my surprise, I was able to reach some previously unattainable goals. Then I looked at some long-term goals I dreamed of reaching. I made some step-by-step plans and did what I could to meet them.

Surprise … more things happened in my life.

Not magically. Not overnight. But slowly, one step at a time … I saw some of the things that I was never able to reach before come into fruition.

Your goals have to be firm. You have to hold them loosely. Yes, two sides to the same coin. Firm in that you do everything you can to stick to the realistic goals you’ve set, while at the same time realizing that you may need to make adjusts along the way. Maybe due to others, life’s circumstances, how you feel, etc. But that does not mean you quit,  it simply means you re-evaluate and make adjusts to your goals.

Also, for a time, since I was setting goals for myself, I wanted to set them for everyone around me (especially my husband). News flash … it rarely works to set goals for someone else (unless you are a coach) you only have control over yourself.

I still have unreached goals, but they don’t stress me … because I know if I set realistic goals and keep “Doing what I can, with what I have, where I am” (Roosevelt) I will reach them someday.

Are you a goal-setter? If so, what plans/projects/things have you accomplished through step-by-step goals?

This is part of a blog carnival hosted by Peter Pollock. This week’s word is Goal. Click over to the carnival to read more entries.

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