Saying No to Labels and Yes to People.

March is Women’s History Month … so every Wednesday I’m joining others in writing posts to Celebrate Women. Today’s prompt is … “focus on strong women/feminism. How do you see each one playing out in your life, views, thoughts?”

Young man and woman taking pictures of each other

photo © 2006 R11 | more info (via: Wylio)

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Between a strict man-is-the-head hierarchy upbringing (My Story) and years spent in a conservative evangelical environment, I’ve shuffled my way through many men/women debates. My pendulum swung wildly at times … ranging from women should rule the world then over to men should be in control and back again.

Through study, prayer and questions, I’ve come to the place where I now view men and women as equals. Totally equal. While I think they are equal, I do know they aren’t alike (some people like to wear pink and I don’t).

I aim to view people as people. I may use adjectives to describe people – short or tall – blue or brown eyes – male or female. But I try to stay away from labels. I want to get to know each person for who they are … not for who I assume they are based on a label attached to them.

So thinking about writing a piece on feminism/strong women makes me hesitate. I admire strong people … whether men or women, black or white, etc. People that dig deep for courage to do the right thing or to overcome a tough circumstance.

I’m not sure if focusing on a loaded label (and issues surrounding it) helps or hurts a goal of no labels. I’m not a big hockey fan, but I like what Wayne Gretzky said, “I skate to where the puck is going to be, not where it has been.” We need to make sure we don’t ignore pain women have and continue to suffer. We need to learn from the mistakes of the past, but not dwell there. How do we best do that?

Yesterday was Women’s International Day and a tweet from an online friend Tamara hit home with me. “The biggest achievement will be when International Women’s Day is as unnecessary as Straight White Men’s Day.”

I totally agree with her … what path should be taken to view all people equally? Is it best to focus on where we’ve been or where we’re going?  Or a healthy balance of both?

Your thoughts/comments?

This is my second Celebrate Women post … here are the others:
My first Celebrate Women post - Are Girls as Valuable as Boys?
My third Celebrate Women post – More is Caught Than Taught
My fourth Celebrate Women post – Books, Books and more Books
Go here to read more posts that Celebrate Women.
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  • http://silly-bear.com Sarah

    I think we need a balance of both–to revel in the strides forward, to put our best efforts for the goal ahead. But we will never accomplish this if we are constantly fighting with each other over the “label.” Pursuing a shared goal of equality will diminish the power of labels till they are not necessary. Lovely post today !

    • http://janetober.com Janet Ober

      Sarah … balance is good.
      Love this thought … “Pursuing a shared goal of equality will diminish the power of labels till they are not necessary.”

  • Marie Alleman

    I’ve spent my lifetime trying to destroy the evils of prejudice and bigotry. God created man in His image and He made them male and female. That’s His word. He made them black and white and red and yellow. He made them big and small and rich and poor. Anytime we look down on one of His creations we are insulting Him!! (stepping down from my soapbox). Thanks Janet for your perspective!

    • http://janetober.com Janet Ober

      Exactly Marie! Thanks for getting on your soapbox … it’s good stuff!

  • http://www.messiahmom.wordpress.com kristinherdy

    I admire strong people, too, but it has to be strength laced with humility, otherwise, it reeks of arrogance.

    looking ahead, to where we are going, takes strength of character and vision. I hope and pray that I have that. I think focusing on where we’ve been should only be background research, it’s like taking a hard look at the soil before building a house – you have to know what kind of foundation you’ll have before you start going up.

    I meant to write about this topic today, but was overcome with doubts about whether I had something to offer on the subject. I wrote about doubts instead ;)

    • http://janetober.com Janet Ober

      Good point Kristin … I don’t like arrogance either. But if someone is arrogant, are they really strong or are they just pretending to be strong, because isn’t true strength gentle and humble … just a thought.

      Also love the thought of studying the soil first … that’s an important detail for a strong house.

  • http://www.veronicamonique.com Veronica

    That in essence has become the major hang up of feminism. It IS about equality, but the word itself sounds exclusive to women. Egalitarianism, which also focuses on equality, has become just as loaded. Anytime we try to give a name or label to help understanding it backfires with negative connotations ascribed it by those opposed or who simply don’t understand.

  • http://www.walkaboutchronicles.com/ Liane Benedict

    I am with you – I do not like the labels or the special treatment because it perpetuates the differences – keeps us separate when what we need is to come together. We would never have an International White Male day or month!
    Thanks Janet!

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